So, yeah, it’s been a while. Sorry about that.
Well, gorgeous friends, first things first. J is no longer living with me when I move into the new house. His alcoholism finally destroyed what was left of our relationship–left meaning, what was still there after I caught him cheating last fall. We split off everything last Thursday night. Although it was already an open relationship, J got really drunk, got angry with me and wanted out. So, I got the door for him.
Ordinarily, I would have been very upset, trying to smooth everything over, regardless of how ridiculous his questions and accusations got. In the past, I would have said whatever it took to talk him down.
Now, no. I can’t take it anymore. I can’t take the uncertainty, never knowing what I’m coming home to–a raging drunk, a relatively sober guy or someone who I won’t see until midnight because he will be passed out until then. Some of you knew this, and some of you didn’t, but now you do. That’s all that I really want to say about this, because it’s not just about me. J deserves his privacy.
As for everything else, it’s about the same as it’s been since I moved into my parents’ guest room–except that the water bill is 20$ higher than before I moved in. Never mind that my mom waters her gardens every day with a sprinkler in each garden for about an hour. I’m sure that’s not contributing to a higher water bill. It’s all me. I confess.
With that, I’m off to bed–well, to watch Pulp Fiction in bed. Laters. xo
ealvfargond 