Greeting friends and lovers! As always, I am so grateful that you are here and reading my blog–so, thank you and stuff. This post is about my ability to shoot myself in the foot and all those other perfectly-fitting cliches. Shall we?
So, two days ago, I got all pissy and decided to post about the apparent rewritting of history. More specifically, I called out the people behind the upcoming music-based documentary about the punk scene in Fargo Moorhead–which, according to a recent interview, was not going to cover the 1980s–when the punk scene happened. And it basically resulted in hurt feelings and bad vibes–so yeah. Lesson learned. I would sit and write, “I will not be a cunt”, 100 times on a wipe-off board and self-flagellate–but I really don’t feel that bad about it, so there’s that.
Today has been a challenging day and has given me a little insight into why I have been so edgy lately. I’m transitioning off of my SSRI that was prescribed for anxiety and as a part of my stroke-recovery program. I have been on them for 18 months, and my anxiety is as bad as it ever was and I don’t feel particularly calm or peaceful. Go figure. And my mouth is really dry a lot of the time, which is creating issues with my tongue and teeth. It’s just a whole lot of nope–so it’s gotta go.
Easier said than done, apparently–I’ve have never been so cranky in my life. And sleepy–I am so sleepy. It’s really like you can’t fully wake up for a long time–and when you do, you’re a raging twat. I hate it. I’ll admit that I can be pretty bitchy and sarcastic at times, but this is off the hook. Jeebers.
So, here we are. I’m grouchy and tired, but feel like going out and doing something without leaving my room and putting my clothes back on. And I want ice cream–but I don’t want to eat it because that requires effort. See where I’m going with this? I wish that I could just go to sleep or talk with someone whose company I prefer to most others despite his relatively recent presence in my life. Yeah, that may actually make me feel better, at least for a little while. But, for now, I’ll enjoy the solitude in my room and be grateful that I am away from anyone that I can offend. xo
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