Month: September 2016

1. This has been a humdinger of a week–and I would be nowhere without my friends and family. How did I get so lucky? Seriously, I’ve hit the people powerball with all y’all. I do want to give a couple of big shout outs and huge thank you(s) to certain friends who have been checking in all week and making sure that the bottom hasn’t dropped out of my reality. 

Especially a certain bestie who knew how completely I had fallen apart (without me saying a word about it–he could just tell) and made time for me today (Saturday) when his life is not exactly the picture of calm. Because I am not a super open person when it comes to my own emotional crap–it certainly helps to have friends who can just tell if something isn’t right with me. Now all I need is a hug (or 100) from my whatever consort–his hugs could bring peace to the Middle East. Don’t even get me started on his kisses (sorry–I just had to). *wink*

 
2. I see that, The Conjuring Two, is on pay per view–hmmmmmmm? I really, really want to see it–but it’s dark out and my roommate is working–and I’m guessing that my cats would do fuck all if I were the subject of a supernatural attack. They may seem sweet and all, “purr purr meow meow”, but I can tell that at least two of them are faking it. And I know, it isn’t THAT scary of a movie–but the first one was pretty damn scary and everyone told me that that wasn’t scary either. Insidious was scarier though.

3. I don’t know about you, but these cloudy days have me in a little bit of a funk. I think that maybe I’ve started to take sunny days and the brilliant, vivid blue skies that are the norm here for granted. For those of you who have never spent any time here in the FM, we have sunny days here quite often–like most of the time. If you read my last blog entry, you’d know that I am a straight up summer girl. If I wouldn’t get total hot foot from wearing my Uggs in the summer–I wouldn’t need winter at all. I couldn’t care less about having a white Christmas.

4. I don’t how many of you, if any, watch the show, The Strain, on FX–but it’s excellent and I recommend it highly. One of the premises of the story is that the “infection” uses the infected to carry the strain to their loved ones (this is not a spoiler as it is stated early on in the first episode)–and that really strikes a nerve in me, especially now. Not so much the idea of an “intelligent” virus that acts with what we would view as intention (as we humans understand/apply it as a concept)–but rather the idea that evil (and I know that many of you don’t believe in evil–but just suspend disbelief for a sec) is insidious and uses love, vulnerability and trust as conduits to reach others and latch onto their emotions to invade and take root in the loved ones’ minds. For example, children learn to hate through behavior that is modeled by parents, friends, siblings and/or their caregivers. Maybe this is making sense or isn’t–but my point is that it’s an interesting idea to ponder and run with–that what we put out into the world is the mark that we leave on it in the hearts and memories of those we care most about. Pop culture can be somewhat profound, if you know where to look.

5. This is inspired by something a beautiful woman and friend just posted. From now on, I’m thinking that when someone is being a hateful, misogynistic and/or racist piece of garbage online, we should make it our mission to hunt his/her ass down and make sure that their vitriol is passed along to their family AND their work (the HR department especially). Screen shots, people–get screen shots–this is NOT legal advice, but common fucking sense–plus, it saves you the trouble of defending yourself of being accused of libel (usually–there would be exceptions, of course–there always is). People who say such things should have to live with the consequences of the hurt that they are causing and the hate that they are putting out into the world. What my friend posted (as screen shots) was particularly vile and I hate that she had to even be exposed to that. 

And before anyone gets all, “but, but but…”, this whistleblower treatment should be reserved for the worst of the worst–not just casual bitch calling–UNLESS they are in a position of power, like a judge, a cop, a teacher, etc.–in which case, that should probably  be known. This is also NOT meant for adults who are quietly enjoying porn or whatever. Porn is legal and it is your right as an adult to watch it, masturbate to it–what have you.

6. Speaking of porn, I read the most horrid article yesterday–posted by someone that I used to respect–about how porn is bad and damaging and how voluntary, adult prostitution and sex trafficking are the same thing. NO, THEY ARE NOT. Sexual trafficking is slavery and it is torture–and it is certainly not even in the same ballpark as adults choosing to be a part of the sex industry. 

And before you buy into the tired, largely fictitious trope of adults being “forced” into the sex industry–please do some research, learn for yourself and then form your own opinions. I’m not saying that you have to agree with me–and I’m sure that many of you won’t. But, to be crystal clear, I am in favor of fully decriminalizing prostitution for adults who choose to partake in that field as sex workers and as customers. It should be taxable income like any other job and people should be able to choose that as a profession without fear of being arrested and prosecuted. Again, you don’t have to agree with me, just do some looking into the vast amount of research that has been done on this particular issue before making up your mind. As for the person that I used to respect that posted such garbage? Yeah, I have zero respect for her as a feminist and as a person. Fuck her for using her page, which is followed by thousands of people, as a forum for such woman hating, slut shaming and misleading crap. My advice to her, do better–be better.

**As always–thanks for reading, gorgeous friends!!!!!!!!!!!!!

So, yeah–where did the summer go? I’m not liking this rush into fall thing that people are all about right now. I love summer–but not necessarily this one. It had some very high points: going on a wonderful, relaxing vacation with my favorite person and whatever consort; a couple of last-minute trips to Grand Forks; a super-fun trip on Labor Day weekend;  seeing lots of friends–new and old; and so many great bands, parties and conversations. 

One of the things that I’ve really disliked about this summer, other than my two exes doing their level best to make me feel like I’m the worst person EVER, is all of the road construction that has been plaguing the FM. I get it, we have only a short time to get projects done up here in the tundra–and it’s not the projects themselves that I have a problem with–it’s the lack of common fucking sense when it comes to which streets to block off and tear up–and when. For those of you who don’t live here, it’s like this–every direct route across town has been closed off at the same time–except for maybe one or two–and they have trains running through them, causing backups that are not to be believed. And then there are the sudden and completely random lane closures that seem to change hourly. Just when you think you know which lane to be in, it’s been changed while you stopped for milk or whatever. 

It’s annoying and problematic because at this time of year, we also have a whole bunch of students from out of town hitting the streets–and who have no fucking idea where they are going. They also don’t seem to know what a one-way street is. So this, gorgeous friends, concludes the introduction to this particular list. Shall we?

1. When did stop signs become optional? Is this a thing? I know that I spend a lot of time bitching about how people drive and park–but this is stupid and scary and just plain dangerous. Now, I can see at least one of you eye rolling himself into another dimension (he’s the one who gets this eye-roll joke) b/c I tend to be a pretty fast and  aggressive driver–but I don’t run stop signs or red lights (yellow, yes–red, no). Hell, I even slow way down for yields and unmarked intersections b/c apparently our schools have stopped teaching driver’s (drivers’?) ed. Seriously, why do so many people around here lack basic driving skills and courtesy? 

2. Also, when did speed limits in residential neighborhoods become negotiable? I can see driving 30 in a 25, or 35 in a 30–but if you’ve been anywhere near the northside of Fargo–especially by where I live–you’ll notice that the average speed is more like 45 in a 25. It’s a problem. The police don’t seem to think that it is–if their prompt lack of attention to the matter is any indication. It wouldn’t be that big of a deal except that it is. How’s that for unassailable logic? I call that my, “Mim’s Logic”, named after the hip hop artist–go listen to his tribute to the tautology, “This Is Why I’m Hot”. Go ahead, I’ll wait.

Are we all on the same page? Good–off we go again. It’s a big deal b/c this is a very pedestrian-friendly part of town with lots of little kids, strollers, adults, dogs and every combination thereof walking around and crossing through the intersections. See where I’m going with this? Do I need to bust out with another one-hit wonder? No? Awesome. Apparently neighborhood or community policing in Fargo means that they’ll deal with it when someone gets maimed or killed. Every single one of my neighbors has called and complained about this super-fun, Frogger-esque trend–and nada. I guess if we want some police attention we should go smoke some in the frisbee golf course and wait for the new and useless “park police” to descend upon us and arrest us for not endangering anyone.

3. Marsy’s Law–just no. If you’ve seen the ads in favor of it, you’ll notice that they push the idea of, “crime-victims’ rights”, because, “criminals have more rights than victims.” Sounds good, right? Wrong. So. Very. Wrong. That’s the way our system is designed–innocent until proven guilty, protection against unreasonable searches and seizure, the right to confront one’s accusers, the right to counsel, the right to not incriminate one’s self by being forced to bear witness against one’s self, protection against cruel and unusual punishment, due process, the right to trial by a jury of one’s peers, equal protection under law, etc. This is our system–love it or shove it. And it was all designed to protect criminal defendants against the mechanism of the state. And that’s very, very important to our American concept of freedom. It’s a huge part of our national identity. The Constitution was viewed by our founding fathers as “incomplete” without these freedoms being promulgated–so they were added as Amendments in The Bill of Rights. That’s what an amendment is–a change to an existing document. And it was added to the Constitution to help increase the chances of it being ratified. 

Why am I telling you this? Aside from finding it fascinating, it’s meant to be a refresher–not an education. We give criminal defendants a bunch of rights as a matter of law b/c they are the most in need of them–they are in a position to be at the mercy of the state and all of its resources. They are the most vulnerable to the government overstepping and intruding into their lives, liberty and pursuit of happiness along with a potential deprivation of what we the people consider justice. If none of this sounds remotely familiar to you, stop reading and go sit in on a civics class or twenty. 

What does this have to do with Marsy’s Law or anything, for that matter? It’s important b/c crime victims have the resources of the state behind them, in theory (that’s another discussion for another list). Individuals don’t press charges, the People do–that’s why cases are called, The People of the State of (insert state name or The United States here) v defendant’s name. The victim is represented by the state. The Bill of Rights (and the entire Constitution) is concerned with how the government interacts with the people through its three branches (with a crap ton of other stuff in there too)–and when it comes to the criminal justice system (the judicial branch–Article Three), the potential deprivation of life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness vis-a-vis the accused is its main concern, also in theory. Put bluntly, crime victims’ rights aren’t really a concern because they aren’t really in a position to be deprived of their liberties by the state. Sorry to break that to you. This, however, dovetails nicely with item four.

4. This may upset some of you–but could everyone please just shut the fuck up about athletes not standing for the national anthem? Please? It’s a non issue–a distraction–an election-season ruse–nationalistic bullshit with a side of sanctimonious masturbation. Why do I say that? Well, b/c I just spent the last hour of my life giving an overview of constitutional law and history to you, gorgeous friends, out of concern that the majority of you either don’t know or don’t remember your basic government class that you took in high school (if at all). And that annoys the crap out of me. Yes, it’s a very rude and bitchy thing to say, and I’m sorry about that, but if you’re going to criticize another person’s patriotism (or lack thereof), you had better damn well know the basics about your own country, its foundations, its history and its governmental structure–the very things/principles/ideals that make this country great. And I am truly sorry if that offends you, but that’s my take on it and you are certainly welcome to start your own blog and tell all of your readers what you consider patriotism–and I will respect your opinions even if I don’t agree b/c that’s what adults and friends do. 

Almost twenty years ago, when I was sworn into the State Bar of Michigan, I took an oath to support and defend the Constitution of the United States of America. I take that oath very seriously. And to me, standing up for the accused in court–standing between that person and machinery of the state with all of its resources, being there to advocate for and protect his/her rights–is an act of patriotism–hell, it’s the embodiment, the actualization of the words of our founding fathers written in the Constitution (well, not exactly–I’m female and that was not who any founding father was envisioning in a courtroom as an attorney–but you get the idea). All I’m asking is for you to check your patriotism, ask yourself how you serve this country–what do you do to make it a better, more just, more human place–before judging another on his/her level of patriotism. And ffs, stop calling any of that brouhaha (over athletes standing or not for national anthem) a First Amendment issue. It’s not. Why? Go back and read item three again–and if you still don’t see it, I’ll tell you. Thanks for reading. You are appreciated–each and every one of you–even if we disagree. xo