So, it’s been a while–but now I’m back and I hope that I’m still decent at this. That’s always been a concern for me–being good at…whatever. When I was a kid, I wanted to be good at studying reptiles and then later, at studying bugs too. Wanting to pursue two PhDs would have been pretty damn lofty even for the most precocious of kids (and I was very, very precocious), but of course I had absolutely no idea what earning those degrees actually meant in terms of the work and effort that goes into them. I just wanted to be really, really good at studying reptiles and bugs.
As you can imagine, reptiles and bugs gave way to all sorts of other fascinations–and aspirations of being good at every one of them. It seems silly in hindsight, but being good at the things that I love doing was a really big deal at the time–and still is to a lesser extent.
I think that that’s a shared human thing, for the most part. We (mostly) all want to be good at…something. A few of us strive to be the best–but I’m guessing that when you get to be 40 and beyond (maybe earlier–probably earlier), it switches from an objective best, like, “I want to be the best of anyone at…”, to a subjective best, like, “I want to be a better best than I was before.”
I know for myself, striving to be really good at something has always been a blessing and a curse–I’m wildly perfectionistic and more than a little type-A–and it gets ugly more than I care to admit. But I keep striving–as do most, if not all, of you do. One foot in front of the other and all of that.
It’s probably not coincidental that the new year has me thinking about change and the resolve to do better–to be better. And while we all struggle and strive to be good at whatever–maybe it’s time to make 2018 the year that we focus, not just on being good at something–but being good at being someone. This is the year that I strive to be as a good person as I possibly can. A better best person than I’ve ever been before. How about you, gorgeous friends? Who’s in?
ealvfargond 